A place not here…

So just what is this place I commonly know as “the other”. At least “the other” is what many experienced with altered states my call it. A closer name might be “underground” but that conjures up images of cross-culture to easily.

I always think of this place as “down and to the right” from my normal state in the world. It is filled with windows and what I can only describe as fiber-optic cable connects thousands of small dwellings. Overall, the scene is part the fragle-rock underground and an Italian city-on-a-mountain-over-the-sea. I think this must be why I like ‘old country’ architecture so much better…or even new england and Boston…

When I’ve been there consciously, so to speak it feels chaotic and somewhat scary- but only scary because of its seeming unfamiliarness to my normal everyday world I experience. I know when I go hear I tend to feel as if everything and everyone is instantly connected. I feel as though I won’t get back to the everyday world, and it’s kind of scary. Like I would just drift away and “be gone” from the world. I worry then about whether I might be missed by others on earth, or if on that level I am actually still carrying on as always.

This place is almost like the “genesis-ground” from which everything springs. I do not dream of this place, at least as so far as I can remember. Rather, I’ve only experienced it in waking altered states of consciousness. Anyone ever been to this place besides me? I’d imagine so, but one might not realize it in usual terms.

I need a good name for it to refer to in our “real world”.

psychicial matters and abuse…

 

Why are people afraid of ghosts? Why do ‘entities’ always seem to be considered “evil spirits”? Even when somehow aproached by what later turns out to be a “good spirit” why are many apt to be scarred at first? Is this what actually causes people to automatically assume that for example all psychics are [childhood] abuse survivors? I’ve known a number of abuse survivors, and what is funny is that I, myself, without any known [physical] abuse history was much more creative. I was actually envied by more than one physical abuse survivors. They were not able to accurately and confidently express themselves, and in a way I hope, at the time I was able to open them up to a positive artistic expression of their own.

Perhaps there is a level of childhood tramua that must be acheived to make one a good channeler or psychic, artist, etc… and many abuse survivors were pushed to far and suffered so horribly that they doubt their own abilities. At the same time, I think that starts to put this little theory of psychic correallation with childhood abuse into question in the first place- Reading for thought: http://mary-desaulniers.suite101.com/psychic-power-and-trauma-a127915

Well, I don’t consider myself a complete ‘psychic’ I suppose- and I decry the term in any case. However, I have a lot of experiences of this nature. I write lots of music and poetry. I go through phases of activity and inactivty, but creativity of some sort has always been my reason for living since quite young.

I guess the question is really whether one can make themself ‘available’ to external psychic energy in the first place. Abuse could certainly trigger it, but without dealing with the abuse in a positive, affirming way later in life the energy to artistically express things may be blunted out. Even worse, it could lead to so-called mental illness, whether schitzopheric or bi-polar, etc.

Perhaps verbal abuse is easier to transmit later on into psychic and artistic abilities, rather than physical? Although apparently soldiers with PTSD have also noted increases in obe’s (out of body experiences) and clairvoyance. I am merely curious on the subject and am not afraid to try and turn something negative into a positive, no matter what it is.

Virsyn Cantor…

 

 

So mr cantor arrive this morn and it seem he will be able to. This is an interesting piece of software…my main plan is once writing vocal music again I’ll plug some lyrics in and relieve myself of some singing duties. Although I am afraid that in any case it will take some time to get the best results, it’s somewhat easier and more compact than I’d thought to get going.

From my reading, a lot people did not like this as a digital vocalist because it sounds so inhuman, but inhumanity is what I am after! haha!

something coming…

What a wonderfully quiet weekend I was wondering. How did this become? In between my workings I approached a state where I did not feel compelled to do much. But while I was working I felt like chilling, and while chilling I wondered why I was not working. Perhaps the reason is the silent surroundings. People make one need to push away, concentrate, stick one’s head in the intellectual quicksand so to speak. I remember doing homework after schooldays in 1^st grade. I would be at the daycare, and being now older than the rest I had to find my concentration.

 

At first it seemed impossible, but slowly I learned to work off of what was going on around me. It was the noise. The need to escape it without offending. The answer was to work, for the introvert in me. Today one might use their phone or computer in a public place to avoid. Doing it with a book is even more questionable, but is my preferred method of ignorance. Why be out in public at all if not to socialize? Simple- Energy. We certainly do not need to “talk” to talk. Not even eyes are needed…just space, coming and going all around will do.

 

 

I am reminded of why I enjoy my space, and have never swam far, whether in a small pool or a sea. What it is too need, is not always for me.

 

They all went to a game, over a third of them, the same.